From Blorbo's reference shelf

A textbook specimen.

Nobody was harmed in the inspection of this specimen. It is the answer set Blorbo files under The Reply-All Menace by the widest margin.

Inspect someone realSix questions. About a minute. No names.

Reference shelf · Case #1932

Subject
A textbook specimen. Nobody real.
Inspector
Blorbo, Chief Gift Inspector
Clearance
Public. It's a textbook.

Diagnosis

The Reply-All Menace

Threat level
Level 5: Company-Wide Inbox Event
Known weaknesses
the "All" button, being thanked, threads with forty people in them
Habitat
The All Staff distribution list
Dressed for the occasion: Lanyard.
  1. Subject once replied "Thanks!" to the entire company. Then replied again to apologize for the first one.
  2. Considers BCC a character flaw.
  3. Blorbo found their name on a thread from 2019. It is still going.
Their group-chat role:
Reply-All Menace
They say "I'll wait" how often:
Weekly
Holiday of choice:
Any day off
At work they are:
Retired from all of it, spiritually
Thermostat stance:
Opens a window in December
A single Tupperware lid has no container. They:
Blame the dishwasher

Verdict

Menace confirmed. Blorbo has quietly unsubscribed. From everything.

Blorbo, Chief Gift Inspector

Evidence locker

Exhibits A to C

The shop opens soon, so Blorbo pulled the right file and two ideas from his notebook. Nothing here is for sale yet.

  1. Exhibit AFunny Gifts for CoworkersThe Funny Gifts for Coworkers fileBlorbo is still stocking it.

    Why this file: The textbook says they reply-all. This whole file follows from that.

  2. Exhibit BWhite T-shirt that reads "Reply-All Survivor", with "We don't talk about the thread" underneathREPLY-ALLSURVIVORWE DON'T TALKABOUT THE THREADConceptConcept. Not for sale. Blorbo is considering it.

    Why Blorbo drew it: Still about how they reply-all. Blorbo has a lot to say about it.

  3. Exhibit CCream T-shirt that reads "Haunted By A Reply-All From 2019"HauntedBy AReply-AllFrom2019ConceptConcept. Not for sale. Blorbo is considering it.

    Why Blorbo drew it: They reply-all, again. Blorbo underlined it a second time and drew this.

Further jurisdiction: The Oddly Specific Gifts file

Specimens live on Blorbo's reference shelf. Nobody on this page was inspected, harmed or asked about their thermostat.

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