Reference shelf · Case #7483
- Subject
- A textbook specimen. Nobody real.
- Inspector
- Blorbo, Chief Gift Inspector
- Clearance
- Public. It's a textbook.
Diagnosis
Red Pen Royalty
- Threat level
- Level 4: Please Show Your Work
- Known weaknesses
- your/you're, glue sticks without lids, a stack of ungraded essays on a Sunday
- Habitat
- The kitchen table on a Sunday, surrounded by paper
- Nemesis
- The Reply-All Menace
Field notes
- Subject corrected Blorbo's grammar while Blorbo was still talking.
- Owns forty red pens. Can find none of them. Uses the one behind their ear.
- Gives full marks for effort. Has never once given full marks for spelling.
Textbook answers
- Their group-chat role:
- Voice-Note Offender
- They say "I'll wait" how often:
- Weekly
- Holiday of choice:
- Any day off
- At work they are:
- The one with the red pen
- Thermostat stance:
- Fears it
- A single Tupperware lid has no container. They:
- Recycle it with ceremony
Verdict
Royalty confirmed. Blorbo got a B-minus on this report. He is appealing.
Blorbo, Chief Gift Inspector
