From Blorbo's reference shelf

A textbook specimen.

Nobody was harmed in the inspection of this specimen. It is the answer set Blorbo files under Red Pen Royalty by the widest margin.

Inspect someone realSix questions. About a minute. No names.

Reference shelf · Case #7483

Subject
A textbook specimen. Nobody real.
Inspector
Blorbo, Chief Gift Inspector
Clearance
Public. It's a textbook.

Diagnosis

Red Pen Royalty

Threat level
Level 4: Please Show Your Work
Known weaknesses
your/you're, glue sticks without lids, a stack of ungraded essays on a Sunday
Habitat
The kitchen table on a Sunday, surrounded by paper
Dressed for the occasion: Crown.
  1. Subject corrected Blorbo's grammar while Blorbo was still talking.
  2. Owns forty red pens. Can find none of them. Uses the one behind their ear.
  3. Gives full marks for effort. Has never once given full marks for spelling.
Their group-chat role:
Voice-Note Offender
They say "I'll wait" how often:
Weekly
Holiday of choice:
Any day off
At work they are:
The one with the red pen
Thermostat stance:
Fears it
A single Tupperware lid has no container. They:
Recycle it with ceremony

Verdict

Royalty confirmed. Blorbo got a B-minus on this report. He is appealing.

Blorbo, Chief Gift Inspector

Evidence locker

Exhibits A to C: what to get them

A real design from the shop, plus ideas from Blorbo's notebook while he restocks.

  1. Exhibit ASpell Check Witch$24.99

    Why Blorbo picked it: The textbook says they carry the red pen. Exhibit A was built for that.

  2. Exhibit BOrange T-shirt that reads "I Paused My Grading To Be Here"I PAUSED MYI PAUSED MYGRADING TOGRADING TOBE HEREBE HEREConceptConcept. Not for sale. Blorbo is considering it.

    Why Blorbo drew it: Still about how they carry the red pen. Blorbo has a lot to say about it.

  3. Exhibit CWhite T-shirt that reads "Red Pen. Kind Heart.", with "Please show your work" underneathRed Pen.KindHeart.PLEASE SHOWYOUR WORKConceptConcept. Not for sale. Blorbo is considering it.

    Why Blorbo drew it: They carry the red pen, again. Blorbo underlined it a second time and drew this.

Further jurisdiction: The Funny Teacher Shirts file

Specimens live on Blorbo's reference shelf. Nobody on this page was inspected, harmed or asked about their thermostat.

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